Humming with Allah

The sun came out today!! The sun came out!!
I mean, I finally saw Istanbul in the sun!

It's been an interesting time here.  I've been having mixed feelings and I notice that it's been easier to write about the rougher parts, i.e. the politics, the sociological, the economy, the loneliness (wait, I didn't really write about that did I?)... Yet, I know that, if these things are bothering me it's because they reflect some shadows in my consciousness... but I'm not going to go there right now :)


I do want to say, that it's been good: this fullness of feeling, this getting lost (I walked for over an hour in Kadikoy by myself last night, nonchalantly but so very lost!!), this facing the reality and implications of my place in a foreign society as a nomad and as a stranger.


But I have also had powerful moments of being with/in All-ah.  I did end up visiting the Blue Mosque yesterday.  It was a powerful experience.


Funny how I've grown to seek out and enjoy churches.  I never thought I'd feel this way when I was a teenager, and into my early twenties.  I do remember the first time I let myself be touched.  It was in Cuba, in the church of La Caridad del Cobre (the santeria goddess Ochun in Cuban syncretism).  Since then, I've had my own personal relationship with "houses of God".  I could focus on the wrong-doings of many religious institutions, but I'd rather see those temples as places where people gather to remember, to celebrate, to reinforce the connection between them and what's greater than us.




I had that feeling in the Blue Mosque.
It was a different set up: no benches, no tabernacle, no crucifix, no high standing priest!  Instead, there was only a huge carpeted floor space (we didn't have to do ablutions, but everyone had their shoes off) underneath a dazzling dome.  Visitors were not allowed in the center of the mosque where muslim men go to pray.  (Muslim women have their own section, which is on the side.  I'm not sure how I feel about that part but I'll let it go for now.)



I walked slowly, my eyes fixed on the exquisite calligraphy on the high vaulted ceiling.  I listened to the sound of space, the silence of awe, and the laughter of a few young children who ran around.  Then I sat on the ground and closed my eyes for a while.  I breathed, I smiled... I imagined a large group of muslims answering the call for prayer and gathering in that glorious temple, kneeling down shoulder to shoulder, reciting the Q'ran in unison... And suddenly a song grew inside my body.  I was humming, feeling the likeness of my body and this mosque... sound, vibration... spirit vibrating inside matter.
My body is a temple.