clown is on!

Last night was my very first clown performance in Montréal! You know how they say that individualization and actualization of your truest self is often much harder to accomplish when you're amongst your parents and your people?  You know that, right?  I mean, that's why we travel the world.  It's not only to discover other cultures, it's also very much a quest to meet other, deeper parts of our self.



Hence, after five years of building a relationship to my artistic self in San Franciso, there I finally was: Café Co-op L'Artère, 8h30pm, on a stage in front of a hundred-plus beautiful people, all of them eager to see the show... ''Radical Vulvas: a night of performance art, with open discussion on gender, identity, and feminism.''

The event was put together by the ReBELLEs Collective, a pan-Canadian feminist collective, with a subgroup in Montreal.  Significant fact: a lot of the organizers happen to be in the Theater and Development program at Concordia, which I had sort of applied to last year.
Let's face it, it was the perfect setting for a re-birthing of sorts.
I had gone shopping for the occasion: cheap make-up, pink g-string, hair extension, none of these items being worth more than a buck.  This clown was goin' to make her/himself pret-ty!  This wasn't the grotesque and absurdly confident Magda, it was a new clown... the eager one, the auguste, the one who doesn't talk.

Of course, I can easily list a lot of things I would want to do differently.  First of all: SLOW THE F*%K DOWN.  Second: SLOW THE F%$K DOWN.  Thirdly: breathe more, and take your time a bit more.  In other words: slow down.  It's a muscle, an acquired skill.  It takes a lot of practice.
On the other hand, I think I'm pretty natural at playing with audience members.  This whole act was half improvisation and half technical.  Getting myself to rehearse was a bit hard at first, but once I acquired the props and started to play a bit, the storyline sort of drew itself organically.  It's easy to look foolish when I try to put make-up on!
I guess that my favorite aspect of the process is how I collaged two acts together, incorporating my classic 'heart piece' as the second portion of the act.  When I asked, a few people said their favorite part was when I ''was hanging from my heart''.  Oh! The power of imagery... I love it!!

Now I feel super inspired.  And I want to do more.  I have tons of ideas for more performances.  Some in clowns, sure, but definitely some other stuff too.

Needless to say: Montréal is growing on me :)