"better" clown

I feel/think I'm a much better clown when I'm outside of school.
'Cause in school it "performance" mode, again.  And oh! How the word is strangely loaded!  I cannot seem to wrap my mind around the concept that the same word is used to talk about:

2. The way in which someone or something functions.

and

3. A presentation, especially a theatrical one, before an audience.

and

4. Something performed; an accomplishment.

  

And what does "1.The act of performing or the state of being performed." mean anyway?


It's the form we take.  It's how we take form.  It's how we conform with the form, but it's also how we "perfore" this same form and help it keep in shape.  Let us stay informed of this.  It's a process.
I'm not sure if it's school that's all about performance, or if it's me.  I mean...
Aren't we all?  Aren't you?
In the meantime, I "pass" as sane still.  Good job.  Thumb up.

Insights... out of sight... Insight... out of sight. (sigh)


People ask why I'm in clown school.  It's because I take myself too seriously, and I'm trying to "heal".  I'm serious.